Vegas Baby!

Grace and I had the opportunity to go to St. George for a soccer tournament, over Presidents weekend. The warm weather was awesome and just what I needed. Her team played 3 games and won one. It was a good experience for them and they really held their own. Then since we were down there we went to Vegas. Now I have never been to Vegas and I must say it was a sight to see.

I felt like we walked everywhere. This is at the Harley Davidson Cafe. they have this giant flag made out of chain link fence. It was really cool and it even had 50 flashing stars.

Grace and Caden in front of the Bilagio. We stood there and waited and waited. Then these tiny little fountains came up and I thought it was pretty lame. So as we are walking off the "real" fountains started and it was really cool. The fountains shot higher than top of the casino.

We went to Caesar's Palace. This is Grace and I with Zeus! What a hottie....We will have to go back for sure I don't think we even got to see 1/5 of Vegas! It was fun but not a place I would ever want to live. Also my car got hit in the parking lot and the bumper is a little worse for wear but I guess that's what you get for waking up in Vegas!

Oh How I hate You!

January, oh how I hate you, January. January has always been a very rough month and this one was no exception. I have felt a profound sadness this month and for some reason I have been more than a little discouraged.

I have been making plans for the future. I found a place to move. It is small but big enough for us. I also applied to USU and although there is so much to do I am excited about starting school again. Maybe this is why I am so anxious because the last plans I made didn't exactly work out how I had, well, planned. I move forward with a smile on my face and a future ahead of me. Most days I am fantastic and I feel like I can actually accomplish it all. Other days I feel overwhelmed, stressed and forgotten. I think this is normal?

In the midst of all of these torn emotions I have been praying. Perhaps for divine intervention. Perhaps to know the ending of my somewhat tragic love story. Whichever it is praying continually. It was in one of these discouraging, poor me, moments that I read about Hannah. The scriptures say that Hannah was a woman of "sorrowful spirit." It says that "she was in bitterness of soul" and prayed to the Lord. Hannah could not bear children and this caused her great sorrow. The scriptures also tell us that after Hannah prayed for children "the Lord remembered her." (1 Samuel 1:19) Hannah felt overwhelming grief because she could not bear children. I have felt overwhelming grief of another nature but still overwhelming. I know that the Lord will also remember me, Nicole, in my grief.

Our journeys are vastly different. Mine has held great joy and unspeakable sorrow. Much like the pioneers we have to pay a price to become acquainted with God. Am I willing to pay this price? You better believe it. The Lord knows what I need. He knows where I need to be and why. Would it be easier to pack up and move home? You bet. The absolute aloneness is sometimes crushing but for some reason I need to be here. In the long run it won't matter if our journey was filled with sunshine or heaping amounts of snow. It will only matter where that journey will lead us. My journey right now seems fraught with snow, broken wagon wheels and snake bites. In the end, though, I have to believe I will look back and be grateful for this difficult way.